Promise Me
by Roz Morgan
Summary: Pippin, confused about Merry's attraction to him, goes to talk to Vincia and hears something's he'd rather have not, but just what are Merry's intentions? ~Slash~ no flames thank you.
1. Keeping it in the family

"Promise me you won't be heartbroken when he goes running back to Estella"

It comes like a slap in the face those words; I never contemplation Merry might leave me for Estella. 

I know they where together once but it never came to anything, Merry would tell me of her while smoking his pipe and drinking his ale. 

Telling me how she smothered him and thought of me as a bad influence, so blind to that fact that Merry had taught me. 

But she was not so blind to my love for him. 

And then they had fought about me, Merry wouldn't listen to the truth about me and Estella wouldn't take his refusal for an answer so they had split and Merry had come home to me, lane his head in my lap as I stroked away his tears. 

I fell so deep in love with him then I couldn't deny him anything; so when he asked for something to make the pain I gave him it. 

Foolish Took I am. 

Merry begged me never to talk of it so we did not, but then he had wanted more and still I could not decline him. 

He stole kisses from me in dark places and then stole me away up to the bedrooms for what ever might appeal to him that night, and I let him. 

But I had to tell someone.

My first thoughts where to Frodo but he was so rapped up in his own problems with Sam.

then I thought of Estella who knew me for what I was, but I knew her for what she was too. 

A snake waiting for me to reveal the evidence to her.

My sister Vincia proved to be the one I talked to in the end, she had no raised eyebrows or looks of disgust. 

But Vincia is a pessimist, cynical to the end and what she said was well the end of me. 

"your such a pessimist, Vincia" I said, voice trembling. 

"I'm a realist Pippin dear" 

I can't listen to her, I won't. 

*****************************

TBC


	2. In my place

~~ warning-rape ~~~

His hand creeps up under my shirt and pinches at my nipple, he kisses my neck and grinds his hips into mine. 

"I want you so much" he growls into my ear before biting down, I know I'm expected to cry out or tell him what I want from him but I can't. 

"Pippin?" he draws back and looks at me worriedly, I know he just wants a willing partner so I roll to my side looking at the window. 

"I don't feel like it tonight" I say truthfully.

"Is Vincia well?" he asks and it sounds like he cares.

I didn't tell him my real reason for going to see Vincia, I told him she had a head cold and I was taking her some broth since she is such a wretched cook, Merry believed me, like I believed he could love me. 

"She is better" I say with a forced smile. 

"That's good considering she never was ill" 

I turn to him in horror and he smiles grimly at me. 

"You lied to me, I asked Nel and she said she'd just visited and Vincia was as right as rain. So tell me where you where" 

he grippes my shoulders tight and I cry out now. 

"Merry stop your hurting me!"

"Good" he hisses and I'll swear I never saw him look this cruel before, not even when we where young and he killed frogs for fun by stepping on them. 

"Merry" I whimper, I was I'd just played along with him now, he's stronger than me and I'm frightened of what he'll do if I say the wrong thing to him. 

He guess what I'm think for he relaxes his hold on me and touches my face, almost longingly. 

"I wont hurt you Pip, just tell me where you where" 

"I was at Vincia's" I tell him, his caring smile begins to slip slightly. 

"Pippin, I'm not going to get angry you can tell me the truth" 

I don't understand what he's talking about, I have told him the truth so why wont he believe me. I try again. 

"I was at Vincia's, ask her"

"You've probably got her to keep your secret" he sneers at me "just in case I ever questioned you, but I know Pippin so you don't have to lie to me"

has he gone mad? 

"I'm telling the truth" I insist and now Merry is becoming angry again, he hits me hard enough to knock me back and I scream to him that I am telling him the truth, I would never lie to him but he just wont listen. 

All my struggling is in vain for he takes what he wants from me and I lie limp in his arms trying not to cry. 

This is what I get for believing he could love me. 

He spills his seed inside of me and I shudder at the violation of something I willingly gave him once. 

"If you ever play around behind my back again it'll be worse" he promises tone icy and through my self-pity I hear him and shiver. 

I don't want him to ever touch me again, I'll be meek and obedient if he never does it again. 

I want to hate him and I can't, and I don't understand him. 

"Merry" I whisper, he jumps probably think I had fallen unconscious, I touch the blood that's seeping down my thighs and now I do cry. 

"Pip!" my tears are like a revelation to him and he's looking form him self to me and then back "my Pippin, I'm sorry" he reaches out a hand and I shriek at him. 

"Don't touch me!"

he shrinks back and I feel proud with my self, but I want him to go.

I don't know why he did it and suddenly I don't want to know I just can't stand to have him anywhere near me. 

But I still love him. 


End file.
